Parents Just Don't Understand

May 26, 2017
Originally published on September 22, 2017 10:39 am

On the Internet Movie Database, there's a section called "Parents' Guide" that helps parents decide whether to give their kids permission to watch a movie, or just let their kids watch the movie behind their back. Contestants must guess movies based on a real description of their risque content.

Heard On Tank And The Bangas: Tiny Desks And Disney Musicals

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OPHIRA EISENBERG, HOST:

Hey, Art. Today on ASK ME ANOTHER, we're playing a game about the "High School Musical" movies - your favorite.

ART CHUNG: My favorite.

EISENBERG: OK, speed round. Who played the nerdy character Gabriella Montez?

CHUNG: Vanessa Hudgens.

EISENBERG: Yes. Who played the mean girl Sharpay Evans?

CHUNG: That would be Ashley Tisdale.

EISENBERG: Of course. And who went on to star in "Neighbors" and the "Baywatch" movie?

CHUNG: Zac Efron's abs.

(LAUGHTER, SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC)

CHUNG: From NPR and WNYC, coming to you from The Bell House in verdant Brooklyn, N.Y., it's NPR's hour of puzzles, word games and trivia, ASK ME ANOTHER. I'm puzzle guru Art Chung. Now here's your host, Ophira Eisenberg.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Thank you, Art. We have such a great show for you. Four brilliant contestants are backstage waiting to play our nerdy games. They're soaking in the NPR hot tub. But only one of them will be our big winner. And today's special guests won NPR's 2017 Tiny Desk Contest. It's the band Tank and the Bangas.

(CHEERING)

EISENBERG: It's got to be so great to win a contest. I have - actually, I won one thing in my life. As a child, I won Miss Personality in my ballet school.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: It's true. And nothing says you're not going to be a dancer like a Miss Personality award. Let's meet our first two contestants. First up, Matt Dorville on buzzer number one.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: You work in content strategy for Major League Baseball. Welcome.

MATT DORVILLE: Thank you.

EISENBERG: Yes. Your opponent is Hudson Krakowski on buzzer number two.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: You work for a company that makes software for news sites. Welcome.

HUDSON KRAKOWSKI: Thank you.

EISENBERG: Matt and Hudson, the first of you who wins two of our games will move on to the final round at the end of the show. So get ready to slam your bedroom door and scream into your pillow because we have a trivia game called Parents Just Don't Understand.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: So on the Internet Movie Database, or the IMdB, there's a section called Parents Guide. It helps parents decide whether to give their kids permission to watch a movie or just let the kids watch the movie behind their back.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: So I'm going to read a real description of a movie's risque content, and you need to tell me the name of the movie. OK, ring in when you know the answer. And here we go. A huge tiger head - it's supposed to be a cave - comes alive and gobbles up a thief who goes inside. The princess is drawn rather seductively with a little cleavage and an exposed midriff, and she does flaunt her curvy figure.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Matt.

DORVILLE: "Aladdin."

EISENBERG: Yeah, that's "Aladdin."

(CHEERING)

EISENBERG: Yeah, I feel like this person was really into that Jasmine.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: One of the characters asks another what he's smoking, but he's actually breathing out cold air. The scene where the sled crashes could be intense for those who've never seen the movie before.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Hudson.

KRAKOWSKI: This is a guess, but "A Christmas Story."

EISENBERG: Oh, I like that guess. No. Good guess, not what we were looking for. Matt, can you steal?

DORVILLE: "Cool Runnings."

EISENBERG: Yeah, "Cool Runnings."

(CHEERING)

EISENBERG: About the Jamaican bobsledding team.

CHUNG: My favorite movie.

EISENBERG: It is your favorite movie.

CHUNG: It is one of my favorite movies.

EISENBERG: It is one of your favorite movies.

CHUNG: I cry. I don't know why.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: A running gag throughout the movie is that people are mesmerized by a repetitive and poorly written TV show in which a man can't find his pants and walks around in what appears to be thong underwear. Of course, being made of toys, the man has no genitalia.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Hudson.

KRAKOWSKI: "Toy Story."

EISENBERG: (Laughter) That is a good possibility.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Not what we were looking for here...

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: ...But an excellent guess. Matt, can you steal?

DORVILLE: "Toy Story 2."

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: I don't know what character was walking around in a thong...

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: ...In either of those, but I like thinking about it.

CHUNG: We were looking for "The Lego Movie."

DORVILLE: Ah.

EISENBERG: A man and a woman talk about their sexual problem. Alvy puts a lobster in a cooking utensil and closes the lid, played mostly for comic effect.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Matt.

DORVILLE: That's "Annie Hall."

EISENBERG: That is correct, yeah. What young kids are asking to watch "Annie Hall"?

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Here's your next one. The concept of a pregnant man may be confusing to children. There is also a dream sequence where Arnold imagines what his baby would look like. This scene is deeply disturbing, frightening and may scare, even mentally scar children - or even adults, for that matter.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Matt.

DORVILLE: "Junior."

EISENBERG: "Junior" is correct.

(CHEERING)

EISENBERG: And then as a parent you get to say that man was elected as governor of California.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Here's your last clue. The bad guys burn themselves, fall on stuff, et cetera. They step on spikes and ornaments that hurt their feet while wearing no shoes or socks. They slip on ice and get hit with a paint can. Intense and quite frightening.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Hudson.

KRAKOWSKI: "Home Alone."

EISENBERG: "Home Alone" is correct.

(CHEERING)

KRAKOWSKI: Finally.

DORVILLE: Yeah.

(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC)

EISENBERG: All right, puzzle guru Art Chung, how did our contestants do?

CHUNG: Matt, well done. You're one step closer to our final round.

(CHEERING) Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.